


Rey and the Lightsaber

by SassySnowperson (DramaticEntrance)



Category: Star Wars - All Media Types, Star Wars Episode VIII: The Last Jedi (2017), Star Wars Sequel Trilogy
Genre: Angst and Humor, Canon Compliant, Canonical Character Death, Force Ghosts, Gen, Grief/Mourning, Hopeful Ending, How you deal with judgmental fish nuns, Humor, Star Wars: The Last Jedi Spoilers, The Force, What is the true test of a Jedi?
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-12-19
Updated: 2017-12-19
Packaged: 2019-02-16 21:52:31
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 6,361
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13062885
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/DramaticEntrance/pseuds/SassySnowperson
Summary: Spoilers for The Last JediRey has a plan. Get to Ahch-To. Find the lightsaber. Get off Ahch-To forever.This plan is foiled by a group of judgemental fish nuns.The Caretaker stepped closer. Rey became aware of the others circling up behind her. “I can’t leave. Luke’s lightsaber is here. Somewhere. I need it.”The Caretaker gave her a skeptical look, gesturing at her belt.“Yes, I used to have one. But I need Luke’s now.”A questioning noise accompanied a tipped head. Rey’s eyes shifted off to the side. “It exploded,” she said, trying for nonchalant.As the echoes of angry burbles surrounded her, Rey suspected it did not work.A story of complicated emotions, unimpressed aquatic aliens, and fixing what you can.





	Rey and the Lightsaber

**Author's Note:**

> Obviously full of spoilers. 
> 
> My thanks to [Aeshna](http://archiveofourown.org/users/Aeshna/), not only for being a sounding-board on this one, but also for valiantly staying silent for the two whole days it took me to watch the movie after she saw it. Your patience is herculean and appreciated.

* * *

Rey stepped off the small transport shuttle and made it as far as the end of the ramp before she stalled. She took a deep breath, reached for peace that she was sure was out there. Somewhere. 

She could do this. She had a clear goal. Find a lightsaber. To do that, she just had to go to the hut where Luke had lived—

Rey scrubbed at her eyes. Kriff. Okay. It’s just...go up some stairs. They’re just stairs. Just because there wasn’t any grouchy old man that had hated her at the top of them…

He hadn’t hated her. 

But it’s not like he had liked her either. 

So why couldn’t she move? She looked back at her small shuttle, longing. She should have taken Chewie up on his offer to fly her back out. But the resistance was small. Fragile. The Falcon was their largest transport. She couldn’t justify taking it away. 

She still wished Chewie were here. 

Finn had offered to come with her. But she couldn’t imagine taking him to this place. Finn, the only person who had ever accepted her unconditionally didn’t belong in the place she had been rejected over and over again. He was too bright for this place. 

Poe had offered too. Poe, with his bright smile and fractured mind, with the scars of Be—Kylo still raw across his psyche and the cost of war nearly overwhelming his soul...he didn’t belong either. This place was too dark for him. 

No. Rey had to go alone. 

Somehow.

Up those steps. 

Okay. Up one step. She slowly managed to lift one foot and put it on the first stair. Then the next. Then the next, each step easier than the one before it. She carefully did not look at the place where she had offered the lightsaber to Luke, where he had thrown it over his shoulder and walked away. 

It was pretty funny, now that she knew how it had all turned out. She laughed. Well, she tried to laugh. It came out as a choked laugh-sob. She pushed all of that away, focused back on why she was here. Get to the hut. Get the lightsaber. Get off this damn island forever. 

That was her frame of mind when she made it to the small circle of stone huts. Determination drove her legs across the last of the ground, to where Luke’s hut was. 

She didn’t notice where she had slept out in the rain. She didn’t notice the hut where she had first heard B— the voice. She didn’t notice where she and Luke had fought. She didn’t. She didn’t. 

Those memories wouldn’t help right now. 

She made it to the front of the hut and stopped, hand half reaching out toward the door. Just go through it. Just go through it, go through his things, then— 

An angry burbling interrupted her train of thought. 

Rey blinked, looking down, to a tiny, furious Caretaker standing between her and the door. The Caretaker spoke again, pointing at Rey and gurgling in an very ominous way. Other Caretakers started to poke their heads out the doors. 

None of them looked happy. Rey darted a look around. She looked down at the one in front of her. “Look, I don’t want me here either. Just let me look through Luke’s stuff and I can go.” 

The Caretaker barked a negative, pointing back toward Rey’s ship and making emphatic noises. 

“I can’t leave yet.” 

The Caretaker stepped closer. Rey became aware of the others circling up behind her. “I can’t leave. Luke’s lightsaber is here. Somewhere. I need it.” 

The Caretaker gave her a skeptical look, gesturing at her belt. 

“Yes, I used to have one. But I need Luke’s now.” 

A questioning noise accompanied a tipped head. Rey’s eyes shifted off to the side. “It exploded,” she said, trying for nonchalant. 

As the echoes of angry burbles surrounded her, Rey suspected it did not work. “It wasn’t my fault!” she protested the accusing crowd of Caretakers. “If the option was let that bastard Kylo Ren have it or shatter it into a million pieces then _I’m glad it’s gone!_ ” She snarled out the last words.

To Rey’s surprise, that seemed to shut the crowd up. A considering murmur ran through the Caretakers, and the one in front of her seemed to come to a decision. She gestured at the door.

“Thank you,” Rey said, exasperated, and started to walk through it.

She was shoved backward. Rey threw her hands up in the air and snapped, “What do you want from me?” 

The Caretaker gurgle-barked and pointed at the door again. One hinge, then another, both twisted metal from where Chewie shoved the door into the hut. The door itself was more propped against the hut than actually attached to it. 

Rey bit her lip. “Sorry?”

The Caretaker gave her a flat look and folded her arms. 

“I...can fix it?” Rey tried again. 

That was met with more approval. And a hammer.

As she worked, Rey snuck glances into the hut, trying to see where in Luke’s things a lightsaber would be hiding. She was foiled by the fact that she was never left alone. Any delay that lasted for more than a few seconds was met with an ominous-sounding chorus of gurgles. 

Eventually Rey just stripped off her robe and got to work, feeling more like a scavenger than a Jedi. It wasn’t a bad feeling. She had been a scavenger a lot longer than she had been a Jedi, and she was actually good at this part. 

She got the hinges fixed, and pushed the door open and shut. A horrible metallic screeching made her flinch, and the Caretaker next to her gave her a horrified look. “Yes,” Rey agreed, “Not good. I’m on it.” She reached for her pack, found a file, and got to work. 

Once the hinges were no longer screaming bloody murder every time the door opened Rey stood back and considered her work. It still looked...subpar, if she was honest. The hinges were fine, but the wood was still warped, it wouldn’t keep out rain or wind. This was eighth of a portion sort of restoration work she had done, here. But the wood had twisted and splintered under Chewie’s fists, she couldn’t just shove it back together…

The Force. 

She kept forgetting about that. 

Rey closed her eyes and stretched out her hands, feeling silly as she did so, ghost of a plant frond tickling the edge of her hands. Honestly, Skywalker had really been an asshole. Rey’s stomach twisted, something furious and sad welling up in her that she shoved down ruthlessly. _He_ wasn’t here anymore, she could be needlessly dramatic with her hand if she wanted to be. 

She felt the warp of the wood, the shatters and splinters, but the wood had been alive, and it carried in it an imprint of how it...wanted to be. That was the best way Rey could put it. It knew that it wasn’t how it should be. Rey reached out with the Force; she didn’t move the wood so much as suggest that maybe it would be happier if it was shaped like it was supposed to be shaped. She was careful, nudging and cajoling the wood back into place. There was a creaking, a cracking, a snap snap snap slide, and then Rey opened her eyes, heart in her throat. 

Snug to the edges of the frame. It would keep out the elements. Rey reached forward, and it slid open and closed easily and quietly. Warm satisfaction bloomed in her chest and she looked around, trying to find one of the omnipresent Caretakers. Sure enough, there was one watching, and it gave a grumpy nod.

Rey almost grinned before she caught herself. How much did she have to accomplish before she stopped letting other people dictate whether or not she had worth? It was a door, and it was how it was supposed to be. It was good. Rey knew it. Why did she care whether or not someone else did?

Her eyes flicked over to the stone bench outside Luke’s hut. 

The closed door in front of her felt like an uncomfortable reminder. Rey reached forward, finally ready to push her way into the hut, get Luke’s lightsaber, and leave. 

There was a Caretaker tugging at her robes. Rey’s hands clenched into fists, praying for patience as she turned to the squat aquatic creature and said, “What? I fixed the door. It’s better now.”

The Caretaker cleared her throat, gesturing over at the hut where Rey had slept. There was still a blaster hole in the side of it. 

Rey looked down at the Caretaker. “I thought I saw you all fixing that.” 

The nun made a smug-sounding burble. 

“You tore it down just so I could fix it myself?” 

The Caretaker walked off rather than answer. Rey looked longingly at Luke’s hut, then back at the one where she had stayed. 

Fine. She did break it. Might as well repair it too. 

Yet more lifting rocks. Rey was getting good at that particular aspect of Jedi mastery. With a wave of her hand she lifted the stones scattered by her blaster shot. She fit them back into the hole, and within thirty seconds, the stone hut was sound again. She leaned back with a feeling of accomplishment. 

She would swear the little fish woman next to her was raising a skeptical eyebrow at her. The creature didn’t even _have_ eyebrows. 

With a tutting shake of her head the Caretaker went behind Rey, shoving her over to the hut. Rey stumbled, then walked over to the hut, tossing a looking behind her and muttering furiously. The Caretaker gestured for Rey to stay, then went and found a stool. She set the stool down next to Rey and stood on top of it, so they were both eye-to eye with the blaster hole. The Caretaker traced her hand along the unmarked stone, thin sideways sheets stacked on top of each other. 

Rey saw the problem in seconds. The old stone had a pattern, a seal that kept it airtight and watertight. Rey’s hastily shoved rocks filled the space, but with none of the elegance, or more importantly, efficiency, of the old stone pattern. 

Rey waved her hand, and her stones floated back out. “I see the problem. I’ll fix it.” 

The Caretaker gave a satisfied grunt and something almost resembling a smile. It walked off. 

Rey settled in, legs crossed, eyes on the pattern. She melted her awareness into the Force, somehow knowing each rock floating in the pile around her, finding the right fragment for the pattern and slotting it into place. And then the next. And then the next. 

Eventually, the last stone fit into place and Rey opened her eyes. It looked good from here, it felt like the right pattern, but Rey still wanted to put her hands on it, feel the shape of the rocks under her fingers to know it was right. Rey pushed herself up to standing. 

She promptly toppled over into the dirt, legs entirely numb. “Ow.”

Rey rolled over onto her back and looked around, shaking out one leg, then the other wincing at the pins and needles. There was a Caretaker nearby, trying to stifle burbling laughter. 

“How long was I...out?” Rey asked. 

The Caretaker gave her a flat look. 

“Good point, I have no idea how you would tell me.” Rey looked up at the sky. It was nearly nighttime. Her stomach growled and Rey grumbled in return. “I think there are rations on the shuttle,” she said to herself. 

Rey sighed, really not looking forward to the long hike back down to the shuttle, then back up again the next day. She had hoped to be gone by now, lightsaber in hand and ready to return to the Resistance. 

Instead she was lying in the dirt, staring up at the darkening sky. Clouds only spotted the sky today, tonight should have some decent stargazing. Even if the stars were in the wrong shapes. It didn’t matter how far she got from Jakku, that sky would always be the standard by which she measured the others. 

How depressing. Rey shoved her way back to sitting, stretching her arms. There was a creak from in front of her—a Caretaker, holding a bowl of something steaming, was pushing open the door to the hut she had slept in. She gave a chiding sort of click and jerked her head, indicating Rey should follow. 

Rey made her way to her feet, more carefully this time, and followed the Caretaker into the hut. The Caretaker was setting down the bowl of soup. She carefully placed a spoon next to the bowl, looked up, and made an irritable sort of gesture at Rey, the stone bench in the hut, and then at the bowl of soup. She left with a muttering blurble. 

Rey blinked. They had made her soup. She picked up the bowl and sniffed at it. It smelled meaty. Earthy. Filling. This bowl could keep someone alive for three days, easily. They must have really been impressed with her work. 

Rey closed her eyes, and reminded herself that in most parts of the galaxy, food wasn’t a judgement of worth. Food came easily, on this world, leaping out of the sea and waddling up to you. The Caretakers had soup, they gave her some, that was it, it didn’t mean anything. 

Taking a shaky breath Rey looked around the small hut. She had sat on that bench, he had reached out his hand, and she had felt so certain she knew how the future was going to go. 

She had been wrong. 

She picked up the bowl of soup and went outside. It was nice of the Caretakers to offer, but this place had too many memories. 

Rey sat down at one of the many ledges that dotted Ahch-To, letting her feet dangle over the ledge as she looked out over the wild sea. 

She stared back down at the bowl of soup, taking a bite. It was delicious in the way that only food made for you by somebody else can be. Even if food came easily here, the Caretakers still had to make it. They still had to put time and effort into it. And they had given it to her. They didn’t have to. Food didn’t mean the same thing, but it did mean something. 

Besides, as far as she knew they had never made Luke soup. 

The sun had set, sky staining from blue to purple, mist from the sea coming up off the crashing surf as she ate one spoonful after another. She couldn’t imagine a place less like Jakku. 

She kicked her feet back and forth over the yawning emptiness above the sea, let soup warm her belly, and felt something like contentment.

* * *

The warmth from the dawn light was finally chasing the chill from her fingertips when there was a questioning gurgle by her elbow. Rey looked down and smiled. “It’s going to be a little tricky, but I think I can manage it. The real question is whether you want another wooden cart, or if you’d like something a bit more sturdy this time. I can modify parts from the transport I came in to give you some more durable axles, at least.” 

The Caretaker shook her head, patted the wood. 

“Sounds good.” Rey went back to shaping the cart body. 

There was sort of a spluttering burble, then the Caretaker moved back into her field of vision, eyes narrowed, glancing from Rey to the cart with a skeptical guttural noise. 

“I’m no idiot. I see the way things are going. I want the lightsaber, you want me to fix what I broke. There’s no way you’re letting me into that hut until I make you a new cart.” 

With a satisfied grunt the Caretaker walked away. Rey went back to work. She wasn’t used to working with wood, but she liked it, something grounding about the once-living material. It was more flexible than metal, but in some ways less forgiving. There was no chance to heat it to liquid and pour it into a mold, there was no recycling from one shape to another. A tree was what it was. 

Rey couldn’t help but wonder if she was more metal or wood, in the end. 

She stood up, walking around to the front of the cart and picking it up, making sure the wheels turned smoothly. Once she was confident it would move without shaking apart on the rocks she looked around for one of the ever-watchful Caretakers. 

She was alone. Hm. 

Rey stretched. She probably could have snuck up to the village, slipped into Luke’s hut, found the lightsaber, and left. But then the cart wouldn’t have been finished. It was a good cart. She picked up the front handles, started hauling it back to the village. 

On the way, she passed the stump of the rock she had sheared off, the one whose top had crushed the old cart. Rey sat the new cart down and walked over to it, running her fingers along the unnaturally smooth surface, poking at the little molten ripples. She looked over the edge, peering down to where the top had crashed and cracked to pieces. 

Curious, she closed her eyes and reached out, feeling the shape of the stone, the sound of it, trying to find the pieces below that sang the same note. She grabbed one, then two, then ten, and more, pulling them up to the clearing, trying to reassemble the fragments into the pillar that once had stood. 

Everything seemed to slot back into place, and as Rey opened her eyes she saw the pillar there again, with it’s peaks and divots. At least it was there in outline. Looking closer, it was covered in cracks and oddly set-off from the base of the rock, where the stone had been warped by the lightsaber. 

Rey pressed further into the force, trying to bind the stone together again, trying to restore the harmony. But while the wood knew its shape, the stone resisted, and as Rey opened her eyes again she knew that the moment she released the Force everything was just going to tumble apart. 

Her stomach churned and she couldn’t bring herself to let go. Sweat pouring down her forehead, she clenched her hand into a fist, one more time willing the stone to return to its original shape. The Force shivered, tension building before something _snapped_ , Rey stumbling back and landing in a hard sit, and with a heartbreaking crash the pillar vanished, once again just a broken stone, surrounded by shattered pieces. 

There was a concerned-sounding tut at her shoulder. A Caretaker stood there, looking at the pile of rock. 

“I’m sorry.” Rey said, her voice choked with pain. “I can’t fix it. It won’t go back together again. It’s broken and I can’t—” 

To her mortification, she began sobbing. 

Her parents were gone. 

Han was dead. 

Kylo had chosen. 

The Resistance was ravaged. 

Nothing Rey could do to fix it. Nothing she could do to change it. She couldn’t make her parents love her, couldn’t make them want her. She couldn’t save Han, couldn’t go back and tell him that she’d be happy to fly as his co-pilot, couldn’t tell him that the offer he made her meant more than words could ever describe. She had tried, with Ben, but she couldn’t force someone to the light and he had chosen—as thoroughly and irrevocably as it was possible to chose—to go to the darkness. And while she had been doing this, while she had been trying, in her own way, to make things right, the last bit of hope in the galaxy had been stripped to nothing but its ragged beating heart.

Then there was Luke, all bound up in all of it. Riddled by tragedy and pain and pessimism, he had rejected her and pushed her away. He hadn’t liked her, he hadn’t wanted her. It had everything to do with him and nothing to do with but that just meant that it was another thing she would never get the chance to fix. 

She cried and she cried until she found that there were no more tears, her grief and rage slowly bleeding off until all that was left was a distant ache and vague embarrassment. 

She took a couple shaky breaths, blinking against the headache that was threatening. She pinched at the bridge of her nose, slowly uncurling, looking up. 

There were three Caretakers around her, looking concerned. Rey exhaled slowly, lifting her chin. “Sorry about that. Apparently I still have some things to work through. 

One of them snorted and the other two rolled their eyes. Rey felt that was about all the dignity she deserved, at the moment. But before she could stagger to her feet, one of them reached forward and handed her a flask of water, the other, to Rey’s complete surprise, patted her knee and gave a reassuring tut. 

The third gestured behind Rey. Rey turned around, and saw that her cart was gone. The worry didn’t have time to get further than a quick punch to her throat before there was a soft rumbling. The cart came flying down the hill, not so much pushed as shepherded by one of the Caretakers, her feet flying down the mountain as fast as Rey had ever seen one of them move. In the cart itself was another Caretaker, her arms cheerfully thrown up in the air, and an expression of glee on her face that, until now, Rey was not aware their aquatic faces could make. 

Rey gave a little choking laugh. “It’s a good cart.”

The Caretakers gave approving blurbles. 

Rey drank some water, and felt better. 

The Caretakers made her drink the entire flask before they let her stand up, then sheparded her up the hill and shoved some fruit into her lap, watching her closely as she ate it. Once she had managed to drink the water and eat the fruit without bursting into tears again, they finally decided she was able to go inside Luke’s hut. 

Rey put her hand on the door and hesitated. Before she could let her trepidation entirely overwhelm her, she pushed open the door and stepped inside. Looking around, there was the meager assortment of items that came with a life sparely lived. Bedding, unmade, like he was planning on coming back at any minute. Spare change of clothes, neatly folded. Trinkets, knick-knacks, a compass on a table, a cracked crystal on a strand, hanging from the wall. 

Rey realized she expected Luke to walk into the hut behind her at any moment, grumble at her being here, again, didn’t he just get rid of her? But no, these were only remnants, his passing had been peaceful but he was still _gone_. This was all that remained. 

Leia should be here. She should see this. She actually knew Luke. She’d know whether Rey should bundle this stuff up and put it on her ship, or if she should leave it here to fade away, like the man himself did.

Rey grimly wondered if there was a last will and testament hanging around here. That might solve some of her dilemma. 

No. She was here for the lightsaber. That was the whole reason she came. It wasn’t immediately in sight, which meant she would have to look for it. Rey swallowed around a lump in her throat and started hunting in corners and under blankets, eventually the sacrilege of rummaging through a dead man’s things just giving way to simple searching. 

It wasn’t here. 

Rey waited, expecting a sense of anger to rise up, that all the work she had done to get into the cottage yielded nothing. It didn’t come. Maybe all her emotions had leaked out earlier, during her crying fit. 

No, it wasn’t that, Rey mused, as she pushed her way out of the cottage again. It was simpler. The work she had done had been useful, practical, and appreciated. However little, it still counted. 

She found one of the Caretakers, who burbled up at her. There was also the fact that now a whole island force-sensitive nuns didn’t hate her anymore. That seemed like the sort of thing that could go poorly in the future. Rey nodded to her. 

Rey gave an exhausted sigh. She knew where she needed to go next. She just really, really didn’t want to. She turned her feet toward the mountain peak, and started hiking. 

Eventually, she made her way up, up, up to the stone slab where Luke had sat her down, had asked her to reach out, and had slapped her hand with a palm frond. 

Bastard. 

It was also where she felt, for the first time, the connection between all living things...and the emptiness that came from Luke, how resolutely he had renounced his destiny. 

Sad bastard. 

And it was where he had died. She had seen it, through the Force, watched him fade away. But his robe had remained. So maybe his lightsaber did too, up here. Rey clenched her hands into fists as she stepped toward the slab, reaching out for the peace and the calm and the stillness that she knew could be found in this place. 

She didn’t find peace. Instead, she found a robe, caught in the dirt at the base of the slab. It looked like it had been rained on, only the fact that it had tangled in some rocks had kept it from blowing away. It looked like a soggy old towel, completely mundane. 

Rey walked closer; picked up the last relic of a man whose virtues and flaws had shaped a galaxy, for better or worse. There was something inside, a metallic clack as the robe shifted. 

Rey sighed in relief, settling the robes on the bench, untangling them them, reaching inside to find the cylinder. She got her fingers around it and furrowed her brow. It seemed knobbier than the blue lightsaber had been. 

Rey, half-worried that she’d hit the button by accident, untangled the robe the rest of the way. She pulled the lightsaber clear and looked down at her new weapon.

It was a hand. 

Rey screamed, throwing the hand down and jumping back from the pedestal. The metallic limb, now just a stump, twitched sadly. She shrieked again, jumping back another step.

Her heart pounding, her mind gradually caught up with what happened. 

Apparently, the Force didn’t want Luke’s prosthetic hand. Which meant, when he…

“Oh,” Rey finally said, “that’s disgusting.” 

There was a soft chuckle from behind her. Rey said as she turned around, “I’m glad I could amuse you. A bit cruel not to warn me of that! Though I suppose I should ask you, do you know where Luke’s...lightsaber...is…?” Rey’s words slowed to a stammering stop. 

Luke gave a small smile. “As a matter of fact,” he said, “I do.” 

Rey’s eyes went wide. She stumbled backward, catching herself on the pedestal, her fingers brushing the hand. Again. She managed to control her reaction, this time, only twitching forward slightly. 

She shot a surreptitious glance down to Luke’s hands. Two of them, both slightly-glowing flesh. Okay. Good. Luke wasn’t stuck in eternity as a one-armed Force Ghost. She may not like the man, but that would have been a bit cruel. 

Luke gave a gentle smile, looking more relaxed and at peace now than he ever had been during the time she had known him in life. 

“I’ll show you,” he said. 

Rey glanced down at the metallic hand behind her. 

Luke chuckled. “I say we leave it. Make a confusing artifact for anyone that visits here later.” 

“Leia…” Rey trailed off. 

“Does not want my severed hand. I feel pretty confident in saying that.” 

Rey’s brow furrowed, she reached back and grabbed the robe. “She might want the robe.” 

Luke’s face lost some of the amusement, his eyes just looking a little sad and kind. “Yes. She might.” 

Soggy robe clenched to her chest, she walked over to the strangely-corporeal looking Force Ghost. “You’ll show me where your lightsaber is?” 

Luke nodded, started walking across the mountainside. 

Rey jogged after him. “Just, show me? No catch? That seems very unlike you.” 

Luke slowed, let her catch up. “It’s actually more like me than...the man I was before. We’re heading for a cave, it’s just up this way. Be careful, there’s moss on the rocks, and it’s a bit slippery.”

Rey narrowed her eyes, looking over at him. “I’m beginning to think you’re a projection of the Dark Side sent to trick me. The real Luke Skywalker would never be this nice.” 

“Oh, don’t worry, I’m still a jerk. But if you break your neck Leia will bring me back to life and then kill me again, and I don’t need that kind of stress in my afterlife.” 

Rey had to fight down a chuckle. She would not give this bizzare apparition the satisfaction of knowing he amused her. 

She carefully picked her way across the mossy rocks, going up and into a cave. Rey could barely see past the sun-soaked opening, the black beyond seemingly impenetrable. 

“Maybe I should go get a glowrod?” 

“No.” Luke passed by her, slightly lighting up the cave around him. “There’s a light source just around the corner. Hand on the right wall and follow it, there’s nothing to trip you, I promise.” 

Rey put her hand against the wall. “You know, I’d trust your promise more if you had been this straightforward from the beginning.” Nevertheless, she stepped forward. 

Luke’s eyes went down to the floor. “I understand that. I wasn’t the best teacher.” 

Rey stopped, hand against the wall, futile laughter bubbling up within her. There was a bitter edge to it, but it was no less overwhelming for that, she bent over, shaking with it. 

“Not..the best...Luke you were barely a teacher _at all_.”

“That’s a part of—”

Another howl of laughter gripped Rey. “I slept in the rain for you! I climbed mountains for you! I would have given anything—” Rey took a deep breath, hysteria tinging her voice. “But all you wanted was me gone!” 

“I didn’t—” Luke took a deep breath. “I’m sorry, Rey.” 

Rey’s laughter caught. “What was that?” 

“I’m sorry.” 

“Oh.” Rey’s fingers scraped against the wall as she tried to grab it. 

“Come on. Let’s get out of the darkness. Just a little further.” Luke’s voice took on an amused note. “Then you can yell at me more, if you want.” 

Rey swallowed. “I’m holding you to that.” 

They walked a little further in silence, before Rey saw light around a bend. She kept her hand on the wall and walked toward the light, rounding the corner. 

Her jaw dropped open. The passage opened up into a cavern, about the size of a snubfighter landing pad, and three times as tall. Cutting through a shaft in the ceiling was a narrow band of sunlight, which shouldn’t have been enough to come even remotely close to lighting the room up. However, the sunlight was caught and reflected on uneven crystals studding the walls. It diffused, refracted, shimmering and dancing its way down the crystal shapes, the light nearly a tangible presence in the room. 

But the way the crystals amplified the light, brilliant and dazzling, was still a distant second in wonder to the way they sang with the Force. It seemed like each individual crystal hummed its own song, yet there was nothing overwhelming or discordant about the cavern. It was harmony and symphony and the most beautiful thing Rey had ever experienced. 

“Kyber,” Luke said, as if that summed up the majesty Rey was currently experiencing. He gestured. “But I think that’s what you’re here for.” 

On a pedestal in the middle of the room sat a familiar looking silver cylinder. Rey didn’t go over to it. “What is this place?” 

Luke smiled, looking pleased. “These are kyber crystals. It’s the crystal that forms a lightsaber. Beautiful, aren’t they?” 

“Yes.” Rey looked around, taking in the area. She stepped further into the room, letting the light and the symphony sink into her skin. She closed her eyes and opened herself up to the Force, slipping into the song of it. 

When she opened her eyes, Luke was giving her a fond look. He glanced around the room. “I only came here once when I was on the island. I wanted a safe place to put my blade. I stepped into this room and...I knew if I spent too much more time here, I’d never be able to follow through with severing myself from the Force completely. So I never came back.” 

“That’s...sad.” Rey decided. 

“It was idiotic, that’s what it was,” Luke said. “I made mistakes and then I wallowed. I was so terrified I was going to make them again that I hurt you. I’m sorry.” 

Rey didn’t know what to do with all these apologies. “Are you going to let me take your lightsaber?” she asked instead, folding her arms and finding that her defensiveness didn’t come as easily when she was surrounded by such beauty. The cynic in her wondered if this is why Luke wanted to have the conversation here. 

“Yes.” Luke said. After a moment he said, “But—”

Rey groaned. 

“Not like that. The lightsaber is yours, take it and leave if you want to, I trust you with it.” 

Rey gave Luke a skeptical look. “But…”

Luke grew serious. “There is a tradition in the Jedi Order. That when someone is ready to take the title of Jedi, they build their own lightsaber. The Jedi are yours, Rey, yours to make what you will. This is a tradition that you can throw aside.” 

Rey softened her stance slightly, tilting her head as she repeated, “But…?” 

Luke swallowed, his eyes looking overly-bright. “I know I should have treated you much better. I should have let go of my anger. But if you wanted...if you’re willing to give me another chance, I can help you make your own lightsaber. Just like I made this one.” 

Rey took a shaky breath. She walked over and picked up the lightsaber, tucking it into her belt. Luke’s shoulders dropped, but he nodded, understanding. 

“Thank you for showing me where this was,” Rey said, not unkind. 

“Of course. Use it well.” Luke’s face was sad, but still held nothing but care, none of that anger or bitterness or fear that had colored his expression earlier. None of the devastation when she said she was going to find Ben. 

Rey felt something in her relax. “So, where do we go to make this lightsaber? I’m guessing the first step is to get a crystal.” 

Luke’s eyes flew up to meet hers, his posture straightening slightly. 

Rey couldn’t help her smile. “I’m keeping this as collateral, in case it turns out Force Ghosts can’t make good lightsabers.”

Luke laughed, his entire demeanor brightened. “So little faith! That’s fine. I can prove myself.” 

“Someone on this island trying to prove themselves to _me?_ This will be a change,” Rey said.

“I saw you earlier,” Luke said, “It was good work you did. I’m jealous. The Caretakers like you far better than they ever liked me.” 

“Yeah, well, you’re a bastard,” Rey sniped back at him, even as a part of her preened from the praise. “And I make good carts.”

Luke gave a little nod. “It’s true. My cart-making skills always were sub-par.” Rey and Luke shared a smile. “Okay. Lightsaber time. Important question—how would you feel about a double bladed lightsaber?” 

“You mean like a light...quarterstaff?” Rey went up on her toes. 

Luke nodded. “It’s tougher to master, but you’re already familiar with the weapon, I think it might come even easier to you than—”

“Yes!” Rey said, excited grin showing on her face. “Yes, I would very much like that.” 

“I thought you might.” Luke folded his hands together. “Thank you for giving me another chance.” 

“I’m surprised you want to keep me around this time.” Rey’s jaw tensed as she wondered if her insecurities were as obvious to Luke as they were to her. “I would have sworn you didn’t like me very much.” 

“Ah. Rey.” Luke shook his head, moving closer. “I hated myself. You I like just fine.” He sighed. “I wish...I wish you had shown up years ago. Before everything, that I could have trained you properly and transitioned power gracefully.” 

Luke sighed, looking up at where the sunlight echoed through the cavern. “Instead I’ve thrown this whole thing on you, just like it was thrown on me. I didn’t handle it well. But you? You could have just shoved the Caretakers out of the way. But instead, you fixed a door and repaired a wall and built a cart. I already suspect that you will do much better.” 

Rey chewed on the inside of her cheek. After a considering pause, she said, “Well, of course I will. You’re still around to help me.” 

Luke’s eyes widened. 

“I mean, unless you’re planning on buggering off?” Rey asked. 

“No, but I—I’m still dead.” 

“So? We’re having a lovely conversation now. No reason we can’t keep doing that. Fix a few things, between us. What to you say, Luke? Willing to give this another try?” Rey took a deep breath and held out her hand to Luke. She was proud of how it only trembled a little bit. 

For a microsecond, fear flashed through Luke’s eyes. But the fear faded, and he reached out and took her hand. Rey was surprised, he was warm. 

“Okay. Let’s see what we can build together.”

**Author's Note:**

> Thank you for reading! I was full of emotions after that movie and this fic was my way to work through some of them. 
> 
> And also spend some more time with the judgemental fish nuns, who are clearly the real breakout stars of The Last Jedi. 
> 
> The bit with the hand is the fault of [Leupagus](http://archiveofourown.org/users/leupagus/), who [mentioned it on tumblr](http://leupagus.tumblr.com/post/168599350138/also-also) and then I couldn’t get the idea out of my brain. 
> 
> Were you also full of emotions? [Come yell about them with me on Tumblr.](https://www.tumblr.com/blog/sassysnowperson)


End file.
